The Secret Room

It has been a while since I posted anything here other than poetry.

Today I must talk about a recurring dream (one of a series of several different ones that recur) You might be wondering why I would talk about my dreams on a random blog. The thing is, I’ve always felt it in life that there are things we as humans don’t comprehend yet. Things….that are just there, they’ve been in front of us for thousands of years. We’ve just forgotten how to look for them and where to look for them. Dreams exist at a strange place consciously and I believe they always give us clues to understand our universe, which is why this narration.

Also, in case the internet or humankind as a civilization ever ends, I hope that in some place this blog post will be archived and stored, hidden for millennia. A record of it might help someone to retrace steps.

Somewhere, there is a building with a secret room. To the normal person, it’s nothing but a wall next to a lift. They’re blue-marble granite-ish. Depending on the path one takes to reach that particular place and the identity of that person, the room may or may not reveal itself to you. But if you truly are supposed to be there, you shall see the wall slowly dissolving in front of you with nothing but a white cube in holographic form in front of you.

Now imagine, you weren’t expecting it and you were actually just staring at the wall. You get curious. You push the cube, the tiles in the wall slide up to reveal a strange new world. It is quite unlike the world we know right now. The sky is all around. There are white blocks, black blocks. At first, there doesn’t seem to be a concrete ground and yet, these structures flourish in mid-air on some kind of quantum alien technology. I am not sure how it works, really.

All I know is. I push the button and I walk into that world. the wall seals behind me. I do not know how I intend to return back.

Before I move forward, I must reveal that all of this came to me in a vivid dream which was I daresay, quite life-like. What happened next, has become a bit hazy right now. Which is why I’m writing this, before I completely forget.

I walk around, explore for a while. It seems hovering and flying in this world is effortless. I jump from block to block, structure to structure. Perhaps gravity works in a different way here. On one hand, I wish I could have explored this world more, and on the other hand it would terrify me to ever think about the prospect of going back, partly due to what happened later.

I soon met creatures in this world, quite unlike anything we know in this world. Most of them seemed to be compassionate and alway intended to help you find your way through this strange twilight-zone-ish world that sometimes would not make sense. Often things would be upside down or rotated at an angle that seemed to defy all the physics I know. But somehow, I navigated. The sky was beautiful and the world was full of strange, new possibilities that kept pulling me into it. Deeper and deeper. I do not know how much time passed. I was asleep maybe for 3 hours. But the time that seemed to have passed during that time seems to me more like 3 millenniums. I learnt things, how to build ideas and cities and how to break them down. How to rearrange these floating structures and put them back together. Maybe I was learning how to be an architect, maybe I was just figuring out the shit in my head, I do not know for sure. But what stuck with me was this intense feeling of clarity and unification. Like, anything was possible to a large extent if I could learn how to break it down and then put it together.

And one odd day, I did venture back and wonder whatever happened to that sealed wall I found my way in to this world from. I decided to find Point of Origin again. It was a terrible, terrible mistake.

These creatures that I kept finding along the way were morally good, I was sure of it and I never quite did question their motives or their agenda because I was so busy breaking things down and putting them back together that it never quite occurred to me that there is always a price to pay for your time in paradise.

I found one of these creatures back there and he whispered to me ‘you must never find your way back here again, but you inadvertently will. It is not something I expect you to comprehend currently. You have been in this world haven’t you? you are marked, friend. You must escape before it is too late’

Now, if you were in a world for 3000 years, I’m pretty sure you would be quite uncomfortable leaving it as well. And I guess partially maybe that is what karma is about. You don’t always get to choose your fate. Sometimes you must pay for your actions in past lives. Then he said to me ‘There is another cube somewhere on this block. You must activate it before it is too late, the red-dwellers are on their way, RUN! FIND IT before it’s too late and with that I sensed the world getting tainted. There were gurgles, and strange sounds of boiling, Red-orange-is pus-like liquid seeped in through the crevices of the point of origin.

I saw these creatures deforming, howling and moaning in pain. Perhaps, even paradise is prone to ugly things. I tried hard to find the cube, but with no luck. Soon these creatures were orange muscular creatures with part-human part-bull like features. And some of them carried spears and swords and they seemed to be trying to find me.

I ran, I hid but eventually they did find me around the same time I found the cube. I had a decision before me, activate the cube or arrest my fate to these creatures. Alas, I activated the cube and nothing happened.

It was too late.

And then I heard one of them shout with their deep guttural voice ‘I am here to claim you as mine, you have spent too long in this world, now you must repent and burn in hell to eternal damnation, come! Or I shall drag you with me into the great roast’

Having no other alternative, I surrendered. I was shackled in chains and dragged into a box. The box was sealed shut. Then I heard his voice again ‘Let the mighty roast begin. Suddenly the box was lit in orange, all around me were corpse-like people, half-dead half-alive, moaning and begging and pleading ‘please let us go, kill us, put us out of misery. And then the temperature turned excruciatingly high. We boiled for all eternity.

A warning, never stare at walls as you never know what you might find.

why there is always a morning the next day

Beautiful Morning. Rains. Birds Chirping.

That unique smell of water splashing away at everything. The fact that everything gets soaked by water sooner or later. everything no matter how big or small or short or long. Everything has a second chance. There is always the next morning to wake up to and see things in a totally different way you never thought you could.

Sometimes I try and stay up all night sitting and waiting for the morning to come around. There is always something I wish was new. something that hasn’t happened to anybody before. The curious feeling of wonder and unknowing that is always there when we are small kids. But as clocks turn and seconds pass, it slowly fades away. there is no longer an Alice in Wonderland. no more boogie monsters in our bed. no tooth fairy. no Santa Claus. and suddenly everything disappears and changes. We find ourselves waiting for the night to appear instead. We want to sleep and forget our pain, our tension, our sorrows and everything that is wrong with the world. We all want to forget it and disappear off the face of the earth, even if it is just for a couple of hours or ten.

We all want second chances. A fresh start is what drives us to sift through the days like a mechanical robot bent on accumulating meaningless paper and throwing it all away. along with everything else. What else is left at the end? not a lot. There are things very dark and unnatural that lead us to see the brilliance and beauty of life. You have to jump into the hole to see the truth behind the image. The irony of the thought that someday we can undo all our mistakes and restart with a clean slate is further amplified by the fact that life does not have an erase button. There is an inner destruct button though. Some of us push it just to see if life is different again. For some of us, it was never really different.

The wonder of birds chirping and a glimmer of sunlight passing through the thick dark clouds while the colossal clouds thunder and rumble like the mighty hammer of the gods is what inspires me.

What inspires you?